Saturday, June 17, 2006

In Which We Do A Little Math

Okay... so Sir Paul McCartney has been married four years to this little tramp and now he has to give her the boot. That's understandable. They've clearly had differences. Things aren't working out. You can't believe anything you read in the papers except if the following is true it is a real shame.

Apparently for the four year marriage, she stands to benifit more than 250 million dollars. Possibly getting as much at 300,000,000. I just spelled that out to get my mind around all those zeros. Shit.

Let's cut to the chase on this bad boy: Why do men get married? Pussy.

So let's see how much the pussy he has had over the last four years is going to cost him. Lets go with the lower estimate of $250 Million.

Over four years, how much pussy did he actually get? He is 64 years old after all. How much does a dude that old really want?

They were married for roughly 1460 days. Let's be kind to Sir Paul and say he got laid once every other day -- which I think is totally fucking respectable for a dude who is 64. That would be 730 pieces of ass. And remember -- this isn't even perfectly new ass after the you pass 200.

So how much will each of these fucks have cost him after he shells out to this bitch he is trying to divorce?

How much did he pay per fuck? (and you know this number is actually much higher -- you know I'm being extra kind to say he could perform once every two days. This chick probably wasn't even that willing. And what about the break week? I'm not even calculating that in there.) $342,456.75

He probably didn't even get laid 250 times in the four years. We could be talking a million bucks per fuck or more.

This is a serious travesty of justice.

You might say, ahhh, who cares. They'll both be fucking sublimely rich. Who cares?

Well, for me, it's the principle of the thing. Paul deserves it. She does not. Unless he cares to share what made it so good for him. But even then, are you really going to believe it?

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